Words of Wisdom
by Silent Amethyst
Summary: "The seriousness in her tone was nothing she was unfamiliar with, but the sadness in her eyes and the hard smile that at the same time seemed sincere and forged mixed along with it were. It was slightly startling." Rated T for mild language. Proceeds CoS.


**Words of Wisdom**

What had dragged Winry's already anguished heart to the universal place of mourning she hadn't a clue.

It was getting dark, the sky a fiery orange and red as the sun drowned further into the horizon. Winry had just arrived back in Resembool, having spent the last five days in Central.

She swallowed back a sob. She had shed her fair share of tears in the last ninety six hours. It was time she moved on. What was lost was lost and nothing could be done to retrieve it. They would want her to live happily. He would want that for her.

'_You have two legs, so stand up and use them.'_ She could almost hear him say to her.

He made it sound so easy. So much so it was aggravating at times like this when getting back up was anything but. She felt as if she were being held down by shackles.

'_It that was so,'_ she'd reluctantly remind herself, _'then he's been handcuffed, shackled and thrown into the lake. And he still found his way back up. Damn him for making it seem so easy.'_

However, cursing and comparing wasn't going to make her feel any better, and nor was it going to get her anywhere. It wasn't going to relieve her of the grief that she was drowning in.

Winry's recent trip to Central would be one cherished within her memory and riddled with a strong desire to forget. It had allowed her the opportunity to see Edward for the first time in two years and had given her a glimmer of hope that finally she would have both brothers within reach, alive and well, to return home and live on into the future with. And then it had shattered that hope as she watched the dark flying ship fall back into the earth and heard from General Mustang that Alphonse had joined his brother to the other world. It had torn at her very being when the same man relayed Edward's last message to her.

'_Tell her thanks. She always made the best.'_

Mustang had described that moment in excruciatingly more detail that she had desired. Knowing that Edward had hesitated at the mention of her was like having an uppercut landed on her: dizzying. With it held the implication that she had meant more to him than he had ever let on. And the way Mustang had posed himself as he said those words, half turned in her direction with his right arm cocked over his chest and a regretful smile gracing his lips…

It imprinted permanently in her mind the visage of sincere golden eyes and the sonorous, steadfast voice of her best friend speaking those words himself, hinting at a deeply withheld affection and defining the finality of the decision he had made.

Winry believed it hurt her more knowing what she now couldn't have than it would if she hadn't heard at all.

Fortunately, Riza had taken her in, housing Winry in her apartment and lending her bed as she tried to overcome her breakdown, reminding her that in the long run she would be better off knowing than be left wondering forever.

Now Winry was on her way back home to the yellow house on the hill. Back to where her grandmother awaited her return and news of the brothers' status. Where surely she would not be allowed to mope around day after day, mourning over her loses and her past.

Although the experience had undeniably shattered her, when it all came down to it Winry was glad she hadn't waited for the brothers to come to her like her grandmother had advised her to.

They never would have come. She never would have seen Edward again.

And seeing him, being able to hold him and know that he was okay, was better than not being able to at all.

As she was trekking down the beaten dirt path to home, her feet seemed to take dominant control and began carrying themselves. They had veered off the road, turning down one of the smaller pathways that led her to Resembool's cemetery.

That led her to stand at the foot of Trisha Elric's grave.

Winry could only stare down at the simple headstone. Edward's brown trench coat, which she had happened to stumble upon in the streets of Central and now was serving as her only keepsake of him, billowed in the cold breeze around her.

Winry's memories of the deceased woman were few but fond. In a way, she had seen Ed and Al's mother as a sort of second mother, especially after her own parents had died. She recalled times when Trisha would sing to her and the brothers at naptime, bedtime when she would sleep over; how she would tend to a scrape on her knee or elbow after a particularly rough play with the boys; that she would be allowed to help bake treats when the brothers were too busy stuffing their minds with their father's alchemy texts; and most of all, serve as a comforting retreat from Ed and Al—specifically the former—when they were being especially mean or annoying.

Initially, Trisha's death hadn't hurt Winry hardly as much as it had her sons, although it had been a great loss. No, the pain that her death had caused Winry didn't set root until after she was buried.

It was when Ed and Al began spending more time together studying rather than playing with her and wouldn't share the secret that they were going to resurrect their mother. It was when they nearly lost life and limb performing human transmutation and she was forced to see her friend trapped to a body of cold, hard iron and the other suffer immeasurable pain due to trauma and automail surgery. It was when they burned their house and left on a years long journey to make right where they had wronged, to ultimately end up in another world, most likely forever.

Away from her.

That's where Trisha's death struck its hardest blow for Winry.

It had robbed her two of the three most important people remaining in her life. And there was no doubt that in short time, death would rob the last as well.

Sooner than she'd like to think, Winry would be absolutely alone.

It was terrifying.

"And it's your fault." Winry accused, her glistening blue eyes staring down the headstone before her emotionlessly. "You weren't strong enough to live and now I have to live alone. You were loved immensely and now I have to wonder what it'd be like to be loved."

Winry frowned deeply and choked back forthcoming tears. "You had a family, and now I'll never have one. You had children with the one you loved but now I never will…" finishing sotto voce, "… because those children loved you so damn much.

"I envy you that."

She stood stiffly and solemnly. Her entire body shook uncontrollably, not from the cold, but from the violent clashing of anger and sorrow and fear and hopelessness.

It was too much.

In a sudden, fluid movement, Winry fell to her knees, her head falling against the smooth plain of stone, hands grasping either side with a vice grip. Her wracking sobs filled the quiet night.

"It's not fair! You had it all and died and I have nothing and have to live! Where the hell is the justice in that? Where is it? I lose my parents in war then you get sick and die and because of that I lose Ed and Al. What have I ever done to deserve this? All I've ever done is help others get their lives back…is it too much to ask something for myself? You took him from me now give him back! I'm begging you…give them back…"

Winry flopped onto her side and slid down, her cheek leaning against the engravings and silvery blonde hair covering her tear-streaked face. A sudden bout of weakness overcame her body and she felt extremely vulnerable. Just as she had a few nights ago when Riza found her, only this time there was nobody around to come comfort her, to rescue her from the black hole was falling in.

"Dammit, Edward Elric, I need you. I can't stand…I have no reason to anymore…come back…"

Her words were lost to the wind as she drifted off to sleep.

* * *

Winry's hurried steps had turned into a mad dash as she ran, rubbing her eyes profusely with her fists and stubbornly trying to keep them clear. She didn't want anybody to know she was hurt. She didn't want anybody to talk to her. And most of all she didn't want to give _them_ the satisfaction of knowing they hurt her feelings.

If she actually stopped to think about it, she'd realize that they hated to see her cry and that her tears would be hurting them as much as they had hurt her. But she didn't want to think or reason. Her mind was too clouded with anger and hurt feelings.

"Stupid Ed." She grumbled, dropping herself against the back of the brothers' house and curling up her legs to her chest. Winry wasn't aware of the other presence in the backyard; that said boy's mother was in her garden and had heard the distressed young girl's approach.

"Winry, is that you?"

Startled, Winry looked up to find Trisha holding a basket filled with vegetables and concern etched into her pretty features. "I'm fine." She mumbled, franticly she wiped at her eyes and hoped the shadow she was sitting in concealed the streaks on her face and bloodshot eyes. Of course, though, there was no such luck. The older woman was very perceptive, as if she had a sixth sense tuned into the inner workings of the three kids minds.

"It sure doesn't look like you're fine." Trisha observed softly, setting her basket aside and kneeling down in front of the panicked girl, sweeping her blonde tresses away from her sticky cheeks. "Do you want to tell me what's wrong?"

Winry vehemently shook her head, not meeting her dark forest green eyes.

For a minute Trisha said nothing, and timidly Winry looked back up at her. She was smiling softly, although for a fleeting second Winry thought she caught a hint at disappointment in it. "What do you say we go inside and get you cleaned up? Then we can take a walk and pick some berries for a pie I was planning to make. Does that sound good?"

After a moment's contemplation and a sniffle of her nose, Winry nodded and stood up, following Trisha inside the house and into the kitchen. If it had been her grandmother that found her, she wouldn't have been hardly as nice or appeasing toward her wishes. Granny Pinako was a straightforward woman. If there was a problem she was going to get to the bottom of it and fix it. There was no buttering up or sugar coating with her.

Winry sat herself on a stool and stared at her folded hands in her lap, waiting as her auntie put the vegetables away. Her throat was choked up and it felt like a heavy weight was pulling down on her shoulders. She was still mad at the brothers, mostly Edward she realized, because Alphonse was too soft hearted to speak up. But now it seemed what was hurting her was weighing her down, and she winced as she recalled the disappointed expression on Trisha's face when she wouldn't tell her what was wrong.

Now she wanted to tell the woman she saw as a surrogate mother.

But being the stubborn girl she was Winry could not voice her troubles.

"Here we go." A shadow fell over Winry and she felt gentle fingers lift up her chin and wet cloth wipe at her cheeks. Trisha then moved behind her and pulled her hair up into a ponytail. "There, now we can see your pretty face. Now," and she handed Winry a bucket, her eyes shut and smiling sweetly. "Shall we go down the hill and pick some berries?"

Winry couldn't help but plaster on a small smile of her own and nodded her consent.

It wasn't a far walk to the berry patch. Along the way, Trisha made a point of conversing with Winry, asking what new things she was learning at school and from the medical books and automail journals she had an interest in. Winry noticed, disappointedly, that she was effortlessly avoiding any questions or topics that could be connected to or lead to Ed and Al.

She was being so nice. When Winry had stubbornly refused to talk Trisha hadn't pushed the matter any further, giving her exactly what she wanted. And then she had cleaned her up and asked for her help and still hadn't said anything. Even now that Winry was ready to talk about what had happened she was still getting what she wanted. And there was the disappointed expression that kept popping into her mind. It made her feel so bad.

She didn't think there was a time she hated getting what she asked for so much.

As Trisha continued to pluck at the berry bush Winry stopped, staring blankly down at her bucket a quarter full of blueberries.

"Auntie Trisha?" she asked hesitantly.

"Yes dear?"

Winry sniffled. "Am I…I'm not an annoying wanna be tom girl who can't play with boys cause I couldn't keep up, am I?" she asked quietly, sounding pathetic and desperate even to herself.

The older woman tilted her head slightly. "What on earth would cause you to say something like that?" she responded, concern and confusion evident in her soft voice.

The little girl crossed her arms snuggly over her chest, her lower lip barely protruding. "B…because that's what one of the boys I found Ed and Al playing with said about m…me." Winry sniffled again. "And I said that wasn't true, th…that I played with Ed and Al all the time. A…and he just laughed at me and said they were just being nice and that now they wanted to play with real boys…"

"Oh Winry." Trisha was suddenly at her knees hugging the sniveling blonde to her chest.

"A…and then I told them to say that it wasn't true, b…but all they did w…was stand there! Th…they don't like me anymore. They don't wanna play with me anymore Auntie Trisha!"

Trisha caressed Winry's back lovingly. "Now you know that's not true, dear. I know for a fact that Edward and Alphonse love to play with you. The joy my boys get just being with you is completely genuine, no doubt about it."

Winry sniffled again. "Then why…why wouldn't they say so?"

She chuckled softly. "Probably because they were embarrassed, sweetie. That's all."

"That's stupid." Winry frowned, her hurt feelings starting to give way to her ire. For a few minutes, though, she let herself be comforted by Trisha's motherly caressing. It was nice, and for a moment, if she just closed her eyes, she could pretend it was her own mother soothing her. But she wouldn't let those thoughts linger. It would only bring on another whole new slew of tears.

"So…" Winry began cautiously, making sure she could maintain her vocals, and lifted up her chin to look at Trisha in the eye. "Will Ed and Al still play with me?"

"Of course they will, Winry. It just may take some time." Trisha assured. Winry pouted, not liking the idea of having to wait for her friends to not be embarrassed by her, and being as keen as she was, Trisha caught on to this and sighed. She let go of the blonde girl so that she could stand straight, and placed her hands on the girl's shoulders, making sure she had her attention.

"I want you to always remember this, Winry. It's very important. Are you listening?"

Winry blinked. The seriousness in her tone was nothing she was unfamiliar with, but the sadness in her eyes and the hard smile that at the same time seemed sincere and forged mixed along with it were. It was slightly startling, but nonetheless it had her attention. She nodded.

"Edward and Alphonse care about you to much to let _anything_ sever their relationship with you. No matter how embarrassed they are, no matter how mad they may get with you, no matter how _far away_ they may end up from you. _You_ will always be their best friend. If something ever gets in the way of that, you must _always_ trust that they will find their way back to you, always. Do you understand?"

Winry could only nod numbly. It seemed that Trisha's words were meant for something much more than the conflict she was currently faced with. There seemed to be a sort of pain stressing the importance of what she had to say. She was very smart for her age, but that was limited to her parents' old medical texts. Understanding this was beyond her six year old minds capabilities. That, she knew as much, would take time and maturity and wisdom.

Nonetheless, she could understand its application to her current predicament. And that left her with one last question. "What if they don't come back, Auntie Trisha?"

At that, Trisha relaxed, the sadness escaping her forest green eyes and her smile once again true. "That's when you need to trust them most. If they don't come back that's when you need to believe with all your heart that they tried their very hardest to do so."

"Winry!"

"Winry! Where are you?"

The two worried voices seemed to echo across the countryside, one naturally sounding more annoyed than the other. Winry turned around, in the direction they had come from, surprised.

Trisha just chuckled, looking out past her. "But I don't think you have anything to worry about, dear. Nothing at all." And with that, she stood up from her kneeling position and caught the attention of the two wandering boys, letting them know Winry was with her, before picking up the two buckets and making her way back home, leaving the three children to themselves.

"Winry!" Al was the first to approach her, flinging his arms around her without a thought. "We were so worried when you ran away. We're so sorry!"

"It's okay Al." Winry assured, pulling away and offering a smile.

"Here." He held out a hand filled with purple daisies to her. "I brought you some flowers."

"Aw, thanks Al!" she took the bundle of flowers and held them to her nose. She then turned to Ed, who had just caught up and was staring at her hardly. If she didn't know any better she'd say he was mad.

"You were crying." He said stiffly.

She immediately frowned. "Yea, and no thanks to you." She callously snapped.

He seemed to wince at the jab, but stood his ground. "You were crying because of me. Because I was a jerk and didn't defend you against that bigger jerk Dylan." The frown on his face suddenly grew to a smirk and golden eyes sparkled, slightly startling Winry. "At least now it won't feel so bad when I get in trouble for giving him a black eye."

Winry's eyes widened in surprise and she almost felt bad about the remark she had made. This was big. He had just beaten up another kid knowing full well the consequences. She couldn't help but feel a little prideful. "For me?" she asked incredulously.

"Yup." He said proudly, before his grin faded and eyes softened. "I'm really sorry, Win. I wanted to say something but…"

"I know." Winry smiled, her ire miraculously gone. "You guys were just embarrassed." She noticed he was about to object but continued before he had the chance. "But you stood up for me in the end, so I forgive you."

"Y…you do?"

"Really?" Al piped up.

"Yeah." She said looking to them both. And then she pulled Ed into a tight hug. She heard Al giggle, which she guessed was because of the bright blush covering his brother's face. The only reason she knew was because she was blushing too, but she didn't care. "And you came back to me. Thanks."

Timidly he reciprocated the embrace. "It was nothing. You're worth coming back to."

* * *

Winry woke with a start, taking in her surroundings and trying to recall where she was. It was completely dark out, with only the myriads of stars and crescent moon creating a soft glow on the grass and the stones evenly spaced out around her.

Then she remembered. She had stopped at the cemetery on her way back home. But she had broken down and never made it the rest of the way. Now there was no telling how late—or early it was. Her grandmother must have been worried. Then again, Winry had never called, so she wasn't exactly expecting her to come home either.

Whatever the case, Winry couldn't find it in herself to care at the moment. Rather than get up and continue on home and crawl into her comfortable bed, Winry rolled the kinks out of her neck and relaxed against the cool stone she had fallen asleep next to. She grabbed the lapels of Ed's coat and overlapped them, hugging herself in an attempt to relive the last moment she recalled from her dream.

No, it wasn't a dream. It was a memory. A memory that had been buried deeply into her subconscious as more important, significant things took precedence in her life, the first of which had been the death of Trisha Elric.

It had only been five months after that memory she had died.

That sad fact, however, wasn't what occupied the eighteen year old girl's mind. Much more warming, light-hearted thoughts occupied her.

In his own…brutal fashion, Edward had defended her and took on the due punishment (which had been a weeklong house arrest and denied access to his father's library) with pride and little complaints, just as he had said he would. He had told her she was worth it, not only to come back to, but to serve a beating and take the consequences. And then he had actually hugged her. It very rare that he would intentionally and willingly and openly show that kind of affection at all, even throughout their childhood.

But he had, and the actions he had taken that afternoon proved to her more than anything that he really did care for her, just as Trisha had assured her. Possibly, she dared to even think, loved her.

And in an even more important way, Trisha had been correct. They had come back to her in the end. And every time following that, every time the Elric brothers left, no matter how big or small the reason, they had come back. They had come back after spending time in Dublith with their alchemy teacher, Izumi, and every time they left to continue their search for the Philosopher's Stone, they would come back. The last time arrived separately, but nonetheless returned. Now they were gone again.

And like every other occasion, she would wait. Ed and Al being a whole other world away would not change that. Of course, Winry had no doubt that this time around would hurt more than all the rest, for she would be alone and there was no guarantee of their return…

But she trusted, believed wholeheartedly that they would try their damnest to come back to her.

With a quiet grunt, Winry picked herself up and once again stood before the headstone of one of the kindest, sweetest, most selfless and loving women she knew.

Maybe the wisdom in Trisha's words had been in part due to motherly instinct. But now that Winry was no longer the same naïve six year old those words had been spoken to, she could grasp the deeper meaning that she then couldn't.

Now she knew.

Without being aware of the significance it would have in the young girl's life, Trisha Elric had passed down that reminder because she had to remind herself the same thing every single day. It had served, along side her sons, as a resolve to keep moving onward with her life but to never stop waiting either.

And now it served as Winry's resolve. She would return to the lifestyle she had taken on the years the brothers had been away on their journey. She would continue working for her clients and doing her part in making their lives easier. And all the while she would wait for the day Ed and Al would return to her. The day she had so far been waiting six treacherous years for, when their return would not be merely of physical means, but by mind and heart as well.

Winry smiled wistfully. It would also be the day she could finally tell Edward Elric she loved him and kiss him as she should have done two years ago before he left.

Yes, she had plenty to look forward to. Now she just had to start walking.

"Thanks Auntie Trisha, for helping me to stand on my own legs again."

With her final farewell, Winry was on her way once again, but now with strength anew and shoulders broad, ready to take what fate threw her way.

And all because of a few simple words of wisdom.

* * *

_**AN: if you were wondering, sotto voce means "in a low voice, so as not to be heard". That's the dictionary definition.**_

_**Yay, I finally have this one finished! It took me so long because I was trying to write a longer version of it that would have taken two chapters but I decided that it would take away from the point and so I did this. Guess it doesn't matter to you though does it?**_

_**I'm really happy with how it turned out, though I'm not sure about the end. I feel like I could have done better with that. Maybe that's just my insecurities about my late night writing talking. I don't know. I looked it over and I couldn't figure out how to fix it without making it wordier, so I'll just leave it as it is. I'll leave it up to you all to decide how well I did.**_

_**As always, reviews are appreciated! And thanks for reading!**_


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